The ruffled letter

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To 2014,

With sheer love and 'only cheerful' memories,
(you know that's not true!)

I shiver as I confess this. Not just from the biting December cold. I am in love. 

Before you get any ideas, my dear, let me clear it once and for all!

It has been you! It has been you, all the way! 

Yes, you gave me a lot of heartbreaks, but you also gave me beautiful souls and bountiful selves.

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You provided me with lovely trips that I always wanted to go on. You made solo travel happen. 

You gave me experiences that I never imagined I could manage. You gave me a cushion to cry and vent out when I had lost a part of myself. The dates on the ruffled calender whispered that you were looking over me but I could not understand, why you never let me make any plans.

Suddenly things happened. Work, friends, friendships, you name it and each morning, gave me shocks and surprises. 

You, my dear, were exceptionally a pain when you made me work without a break. 

I know, you prepared me for what lay ahead. But, those were my sulky days and you gave me your shoulders. 

I knew my life's a waiting game. Ultimately and untimely, things changed. 

You gave me a fairytale's beginning for which I may not see the end. Yet, I was mesmerised. You hooked me up with yourself. And now as you are taking me along, will you promise to standby?

Another year to my age and with that 2015 lies ahead with new hopes and old expectations.

Can we share stories, stories and more stories? 

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Yours lovingly and fully in awe, 

Merry Xmas and A Very Happy New Year :)

P.S: Shhhh...don't give me silences. Time to talk over a cup of filter coffee. Right?

Remembering the Reclaimer!

Just days before my 21st, I came across a photograph that triggered so many memories, some very clearly replayed in my mind, some which were faint but either ways, they add up to a life that I had lived and silently left behind to say the least. 

Immediately, the first remark that I hear form one of my parent was that I was so much better when I was in that particular picture and ironically, I had a very different and infact, the very opposite strand of thought running in my mind- The fact that I think of myself much more positively now and in other words, more aware about how my surroundings and how things are around me currently. 

GYAN BHARATI SCHOOL third standard BATCH 2000-2001

Unfortunately, my parents think that the same level of so-called awareness has taken away my innocence.

(With all respect) They think that the girl who would be so happy to do all their work back then , now does not bother to do even half! They see all the 'going down the drain' changes in me and I think, the knowledge that I have gathered owing to a change in the surroundings, my college life, the course I am pursuing and the various other interests that have only made me in tune with the times and infact, meeting several kinds of people that I have come across at certain points of time who have expectedly or unexpectedly managed to contribute peculiar insights and lessons in my life in their own ways, whether a small token or big package have only made me a much better and infact, a mature being in love with the intricacies of life. 

 

A person I aspired to be and infact, I only seek more in the times to come! While growing up, I always wanted to reclaim the happiness that I thought, I had lost somewhere,

I was desperate to reclaim my right to choose that I found was mine yet was never allowed to make,

I was hell bent on reclaiming my way of life, my way of living and my own self in the multiple identities of life in the multifaceted societies and so today, I see a change that I ought to bring in ME and eventhough, my parents don't see it that way, yet I am sure, I have grown as a person, for the better!

Carefree, my days? They never will be, because I aspire for the unknown and the dreams that limmer with the pause to remember the reclaimer!

A conversation that was indeed special!

'Twinkle twinkle little star, how i wonder what you are?'

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A kindergarden poem that goes like this is a memory that we all hold dear and definitely many such memories form a part of life that we all live and cherish. A part of these wonderful memories are conversations that we tend to have as we are growing up and even after we have grown up to remind us that there is no best thing than to share our experiences, emotions and situations with people who are so dear. It could be family, friends or even acquaintances on a journey giving us good moments that are indeed special.

A life that has no such memories is not worth living and a life where even after such memories, its not shared is even more of a curse because conversations are the best way to bring out the innermost feelings that are always true.

Whether, over a cuppa of coffee or on a social networking site or a simple one-to-one phone or message talk, the sharing of life is indeed a very special way to reinstate the fact about the way we respect and value a part of ourselves, whether it is sweet or bitter, good or bad, beautiful or ugly!

It may just be a conversation but the effect it has on the soul is commendable. The relief it provides is a welcome respite from sorrows that overpower the peace of mind and joys that accompany flashbacks of stories and incidents are even more good memories of life that give strength during testing times.

An ice-breaking session on the first day of school, college, office, or even camps are no less carried out for the same purpose. Conversations matter simply because they are the best ways to get to know the other person and even understand oneself in a much better way. I remember a friend who shared her childhood experience with the whole batch and i could sense a smile that was so unique to her, a kind of enigma that was lost in a world which was not her place, her memories and her life.

A heart to heart coversation after a long time with a dear friend made me realise how badly i had missed those times that we shared and valued. The emotions were mutual but the conversations took us to a part that we generally avoided to talk about and yet we talked about it and got to know the matters of concern.

 

A memory of life that we tend to cherish is about our first love and talking to an elderly person, a friend cum philosopher cum guide with a smiling face and a magnificent aura made me realise how much that love means to me and the invaluable joy that sharing such a personal thing holds. An advise to wait and understand my own self in times when i was close to breaking down made me realise the value that solutions come only when we tend to open up to solve the complex emotions that accompany them.

Just a playful conversation about times to come can also be so close to heart if only we give time and respect the person with whom you had or are sharing your life. Its very important to remember that relations only build up and continue to be strong if given time to nurture and conversations are an inextricable part of the time shared.

So just sit back and start conversing and value each word that matters so lot!

The times that are hard to forget………..

DEAR LIFE!

THANK YOU! These two words together define your importance that has made me what I am today……. What I have got today………what I have lost and still moved on with a smile……..a lot of things that are hard to resist……definitely……these were and are times that are hard to forget!

Few days after I was born, I left my native place to come to New Delhi and it is been 20 years now that I have lived here.  I cherish those moments when I used to travel in trains during peak summers to reach south of India in the vacations…memories that have become hard to forget! I used to play with my cousins, visit distant relatives and enjoy royal treatment in the name of ‘Delhi ’ (yeah ! Trust me, Delhi used to or in my case still holds an equal footing as to the Americas). The laughter, those cries, those jealousies, those gifts that surprised, those blessings that remain are memories that are hard to forget! I grew up meeting people and making friends, sharing my life, that is, you with them, listening to their stories, creating new ones that are hard to forget. The feelings of accomplishment, awards and appreciation through school years, the teachers under whom, there are special times spent are beautiful memories that are hard to forget. The dreams of pursuing success and the entry into College went hand in hand and the wonderful time that went by, are definitely hard to forget! An unexpected trip with friends from College to an Ashram in Rishikesh changed the way I perceived relationships and that gave me an unexplored angle of myself that is hard to forget.  I started believing more in myself and a mystique power of the Almighty that continues to pave the way of my future…..times that are hard to forget!  For, a Journey that’s just reached a milestone of 20, hoping and wishing for more and more times that are just hard to believe and forget.