Wish, I had wings!

Well, so many times, eyes await this dream of having wings to come true, 

sometimes in awe and sometimes in rue,

Life feels unfamiliar, either in wonder or crashes like never before,

moments, similar pass through, with eyes sore!

Meanwhile, few others seem to join in the queue,

yet, you keen to continue,

just seeking those golden wings,

to add to the chiming rings

Give me those wings!

that love the sweet smell

Remembering the Reclaimer!

Just days before my 21st, I came across a photograph that triggered so many memories, some very clearly replayed in my mind, some which were faint but either ways, they add up to a life that I had lived and silently left behind to say the least. 

Immediately, the first remark that I hear form one of my parent was that I was so much better when I was in that particular picture and ironically, I had a very different and infact, the very opposite strand of thought running in my mind- The fact that I think of myself much more positively now and in other words, more aware about how my surroundings and how things are around me currently. 

GYAN BHARATI SCHOOL third standard BATCH 2000-2001

Unfortunately, my parents think that the same level of so-called awareness has taken away my innocence.

(With all respect) They think that the girl who would be so happy to do all their work back then , now does not bother to do even half! They see all the 'going down the drain' changes in me and I think, the knowledge that I have gathered owing to a change in the surroundings, my college life, the course I am pursuing and the various other interests that have only made me in tune with the times and infact, meeting several kinds of people that I have come across at certain points of time who have expectedly or unexpectedly managed to contribute peculiar insights and lessons in my life in their own ways, whether a small token or big package have only made me a much better and infact, a mature being in love with the intricacies of life. 

 

A person I aspired to be and infact, I only seek more in the times to come! While growing up, I always wanted to reclaim the happiness that I thought, I had lost somewhere,

I was desperate to reclaim my right to choose that I found was mine yet was never allowed to make,

I was hell bent on reclaiming my way of life, my way of living and my own self in the multiple identities of life in the multifaceted societies and so today, I see a change that I ought to bring in ME and eventhough, my parents don't see it that way, yet I am sure, I have grown as a person, for the better!

Carefree, my days? They never will be, because I aspire for the unknown and the dreams that limmer with the pause to remember the reclaimer!

Staying away!

One of the most difficult things in the world is to tell yourself to stay away from a whole lot of things in life...and sometimes...life itself! A dream telling you to stay away from reality, Images telling you to stay away from illusion, mind telling you to stay away from stranded thoughts, the waves telling you to stay away from the obvious threat, a rainy and chilly morning telling you to stay away from work , and happiness telling you to stay away from a dreamy land and then there is certainly a constant tussle between heart and mind telling you to stay away from a distanced sweetheart!

I would not mind accepting that i am in one such confusion, a confusion that is hard to solve and infact, i don't want a solution because, at first glance, this confusion is much better than what the reality might await! It is strange, how at some point of time, i feel like staying away and it feels as if I am away from my own self, as if, It is not me but someone else at my place. 

 

These words might not make much difference to the world that I am in, but I am sure that they will make a mark where its due!

'Stay away' has not been asked for but then there is the constant turmoil inside that tells you to stay away and when you try doing that, it makes you realise, there is no way that makes staying away easier!

Let there be light soon!

The 'shor' about complexity!

Sitting in a gender studies class, i often wonder (yes! I need to do that) if we have made our lives more complex and complicated than its ought to be, followed by more deconstructions and reading between the lines in depth than is necessary and giving too much thought to things that really do not have much meaning! I appreciate that the human mind is thinking and trying to understand complex issues but too much criticism in the veil of 'constructive criticism' does not seem fit always and tends to drag on leading to habits of thinking and thinking too much without any gain.

 

Consider, for example, finding out the meaning of each and every dialogue, monologue or imagery whether an advertisement or a film or lyrics of a song for that matter. The problem does not lie in pointing out the 'wrong' but the problem lies in pointing out the 'wrong' always and being the so-called critic till the end of the day!

 

C'mon!

There is something called life and such things are part and parcel of it but delving too much into everything is highly problematic because it automatically increases the vulnerability of the group which has yet not been affected and has remained more or less ignorant of the matter. Uproar follows on matters that need less control contributing to the side-lining of the major issue and that does not help the cause.

 

It is not a bad idea to stick to tried and tested methods...the so-called Stereotypes as they are not always re-inforcing anything different from the way the society thinks and acts and as such, it is not a compulsion to change. No matter, how good the notion of breaking barriers and bringing about change remains, but the fascination with the whole idea of making things too complex remains a problem with many and the fact that relative and more equivalent issues do not find enough space is a subsequent problem. In simple words, we get caught up with too small and petty issues that the significant issues do not find footing!

Keeping simple things simple has become complex these days!

 

Blaming it on the Media, law and Judiciary or us as individuals might not help much but can we for a 'CHANGE' , keep things simple? Food for thought!

OPENING OF THE PANDORA'S BOX AND MIGHTY HUMANITY GONE ALL WRONG?

SHE WAS I....I AM SHE?

 

Enough has already been said and done about 'security' and 'safety' for women and there is no point in re-emphasising what the Government, media and the general public has been saying about the issue of brutality and violence against women. Its so strange that living in a democratic country per say has not really meant anything when it comes to a woman's independence. Everybody says that today's women have undergone tremendous changes where they have become career-oriented and achieved a lot of success while at the same time, proving to be excellent multi-taskers but the change has disappointingly and disapprovingly not been seen in the society's mindset and attitudes towards women and that in fact is a spot and a shameful way of progress in a developing country.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The talks regarding Human Rights have significance only when Respect is shown to humans as a whole and women particularly and they are not treated as animals/inanimate objects to be used and thrown away or repeatedly abused. The current Delhi Rape case has opened an old Pandora's box but in full view because the Media has been covering the issue with a lot of impact and the getting together of the people-young and aged alike has been gaining momentum which are becoming an inspiration to rise against such heinous crimes.

 

The Humanity as we witness it today has become more of a challenge to sustain and such cases highlight that impact to a very great extent. The problem is there for everyone to see and experience but the fact remains that nobody wants to take any action which would set an example simply because, it seems to be a woman's problem.....a woman's issue....and therefore pretty feminist in approach, that is definitely not that significant as compared to Budgets and financial policies that remain a man's forte.

 

As the old and famous phrase 'The opening of the Pandora's box' has a story attached to it where according to ancient Greek mythology, Zeus had given a box containing the evils and miseries of humankind to Pandora with instructions not to open it but she had eventually opened it out of curiosity and as such the perception and attitude towards women remains to be highly regarded as problem creators and therefore, they are left to solve their own problems at the mercy of a seamless web of administrative and bureaucratic pressures, the uncouth population and an helpless judiciary. This Pandora's box has not only opened the darker side of society but has brought a woman and her dignity into the mainstream society by highlighting that Identity Politics is a dangerous and highly situation-oriented phenomenon that seems debated and highly vulnerable in tough waters.

A woman is supposedly given a voice with a 33% reservation as compared to men in Political fields but the remnants of that number remain when no sort of cruelty and brutality is left to any sought of imagination and the character of the very same woman stands to questions.

 

The question of the humanity and sea of change goes all wrong with not the opening of the Pandora's box but with the closing of a thinking mind whereby Women are no more human beings....!! Its not the opening of the Pandora's box that has spelt doom for humanity but the closing of the doors to change!    

 

 

Karva Chauth is fine- what about THE MOON?

Moon, you have a shade of blue tonight –
Is it something that you saw or heard?
Only yesterday, your tone was proud and bright,
Yellow silver, full, and so assured.

These lines by Mark R Slaughter in' Moon, We Look to You' http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/moon-we-look-to-you/  just add to the significance of the day for millions of glaring eyes who look upto the Moon, some in the anticipation of breaking their fast for their dear (or could just be the opposite) husbands and the rest in their criticism of the custom. Either ways, Moon is the talking point of the whole day and the Guest of Honour for the evening. I don't know if anybody would have waited so much even for their husbands than for a glimpse of this brightest object in the night sky.

Its believed to be good for safety and longetivity of the husband and therefore, called the ideal wife's duty. OK! I get the point. But ever thought about the Moon?

The pointers!
The Fasting souls- whether married or otherwise pray for their husband's long lives, good enough but what about the criticism, abuses and the undue pressure on the Moon for making it on time?

The Moon for most people, especially those in love or married (notice the pun) is the constant unit of comparison. Though on an everyday basis, its compared to the beauty of the woman, on this day, for a change the comparison is with the man and that is why a sieve or sifter is used. Sadly, no holiday!

Remember, Dear ladies, lunatic decisions of your life when choosing a life partner might have made you suicidal, but fasting your way towards it on a Lunar moon day is definitely not in anybody's interest.

CONCLUDING REMARKS OF THE MOON-

Miles away, often i wait for you to see me,
so, here, i take my sweet revenge when you long for me!


         HAPPY KARVA CHAUTH :)

Just some time!

www.google.com

Yes, there's me and there's you! There is my life that revolves around you and there is your life where i am not even in the reflections of the moon! I always dream of time doing wonders, and "just some time" is what i keep telling myself, but will it ever happen?
 
A year and a quarter that i know you, and i always look forward to the time when you will say the same about me. I feel the warmth of the morning sun when i hear your voice, remembering each and every smile that i have shared with you, every worry that did not seem troublesome after sharing them with you, few miles that i never imagined i could cover became my life's treasure hunt all because of you!
 
You might not realise your own worth, just some time with me can answer for all these unknowns.
 
          I promise you, i will never leave you, in the extremes of situations,
          take me with you to a world full of us, Just some time,
          I wish you could tell me before the aisle starts!!



www.google.com

There is you and there is me.....JUST SOME TIME...."THERE IS US?"

 

Ganesha brought home and with it, some thoughts too!

A very HAPPY GANESH CHATURTHI to all of you! 

"The 'reliever of pains and troubles' or  विग्नहर्था  is not just a friend, philosopher and guide, he is 'GANU BHAIYA' who saves one and all from trouble".

                                               

This seems to be a very common line with many people's lives, the expectation to reach the Almighty, to the highest possible echelon of spirituality, to please the unknown powers who are considered to be known, read and followed through mythological texts, inscriptions and folk lores for successful beginnings in all endeavours.

There is nothing wrong with the idea of looking up and remembering the 'power above' but the problem starts when people are not allowed to follow their own spiritual paths and make their choice in terms of whom they consider to be their ideal supreme power.

Although, am not a veteran with mythology as a subject and also not on the path of spirituality but i do believe that truthfulness to the self and faith in the powers of the almighty are ways to enlighten oneself as well as engage with the self, but the immense satisfaction that becomes visible on the face and even in the mind, is incomparable and that for me, is the true engagement with God. This remarkable feeling varies from people to people and that is where the tolerance to all religions and faiths as mentioned even in the Constitution of India for that matter stands true to itself.

Oneness in diversity is explicable but the beauty lies in understanding that the oneness has different interpretations and meanings over time and that is a significant part to preach and practice.

                                        

Arranged 25 years ago- A wedding!

There are many people in life who matter a lot but there are very few who matter the most and AMMA and APPA make it to the top of the list, just by being there always, caring, worrying and loving me in their own ways!

On the eve of 25 years of their married life, i feel a bit of amazement, wonder, and happiness and even a sense of bewilderment, considering they managed to keep the wheels of the cart of an arranged marriage going despite their constant fights, over expectations of each other and disappointments, their opposite natures and a 'superfluous happily married life' that has had more share of low patches than happy moments. A marriage that seems to survive now because of a duty towards a daughter, born after lot of prayers and hymns to all dieties across temples as surprising as it seems, is a reality they deal with and in that reality, they constantly try to keep going with a lot of speed breakers that no longer make any difference simply because, another four letter word has seemed to replace a much significant word.

www.google.com

DUTY has replaced LOVE. Or did ever love happen at the first place? Am i hallucinating too much or simply taking them for granted? These and many such questions have plagued me for a long time now, growing up has been tough but still, they have been wonderful parents, no matter what! THANKYOU does not make sense, as Amma says even now, '' why are you thanking me? There is no thankyou between a mother and her daughter'' yet, i feel obliged that inspite of a so-called 'marital discord', you both have been there!

On the morning of 21st August 1987, two people got married with a lot of dreams and expectations of each other. Those times have changed such that those dreams and expectations hold no meaning anymore. There is no love lost between them. However, they have managed to find me....only if they could have truly found each other, i could have surely seconded 'matches are made in heaven'.

A WRITING ON THE WALL?

Life gives you everything but not what you need the most. "HAPPY SILVER JUBILEE? " Period.

'Gangs' at home!

Its saturday night.....its the time to party...go out.....have fun .....watch movies....and a typical saturday night turns out to be dud....how would the feeling be?

Yes...thats what i am feeling right now!

Missing a premiere of the movie 'Gangs of Wasseypur Part 2' at Osian Cine Fan Festival at Siri Fort, New Delhi sounds dumb and unfortunate specially when its before the movie hits the silver screens and its the for no charge but then thats how some days are or rather some much awaited evenings are! As usual, there are no prizes for guessing the reason behind missing out the action. Parents who like to have their kids at home idle but not 'wasting time' by watching a movie and that too a much anticipated and awaited one!

A feeling of pity just overpowers when you have the seat even, everything decided and in place but not the permission! Its a bit unfair but then thats how a fuss is created and am trying to master the skill....so just wait and see if it works and at the least a show gets booked for the coming week!

        ACTION STARTS.....' GANGS OF A HOME' ......AND DRAMA!

          Too much? or too less? Make a fuss and earn a ticket.....

Coming soon....!